When Mom died I buried myself emptying out closets, tearing up musty carpets decades old and sanding down the original pine floors in my house (many rooms at the same time I might add). When Dad died, a century of wallpaper was ferociously stripped and I re-papered (again, many rooms at the same time). Apparently, my therapy for loss is to throw myself, arms flailing, into something way beyond rational process and I appear to be in this place again. I have renters now so tearing apart my house isn’t an option and I don’t feel like it anyway. (Actually, I have gotten darn near obsessively tidy).
I want to make quilts – detailed patchwork quilts. Which is bizarre as ‘detail’ generally has no place in my vocabulary. My quilts in the past have been big, fast blocks and like my cooking, I don’t measure…at all.
So I buy a cutter, quilting ruler, board, quilting book, and some material. (That is a first and due to the cost, a last). The woman suggested classes and advised me to take home little samples and take some time to think about it. So funny. “No thanks, I need it all now,” I respond. (She looked a little scared). So here I am measuring and cutting and sewing with a vengeance. Many of the 2 inch squares and triangles have gotten way smaller and it doesn’t look at all like it does in the book. I did finally get my reading glasses out as I was tired of aiming the thread in the general direction of the needle and repeatedly managing to stab my finger checking to see if the thread made it through. sigh.
I will keep at it – patching together the pieces. And I will try to slow down just enough.
“Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that isn’t you – all of the expectations, all of the beliefs – and becoming who you are.” – Rachel Naomi Remen
Humor is healing and your writings Arlene (including your previous write ups in the Kanata courier)have brought a smile to my face on more than one occasion as well as your never give up attitude has been an inspiration to get my butt back on track when I have on occasion felt like giving up. When you are finished find someone really special to bless with your healing quilt as I am sure its imperfect beauty will be appreciated by the right kindred soul.
Sending big hugs, with love
If this is what works go for it. if ever you need company to quilt let me know!
how well i remember the rooms & how well i remember the endless bolts of fabric , but more importantly i remember each task was at some point completed and with that i know some type of closure was acheived .we each find our own zone to deal with dfferent matters of the heart & mind so with that said , sew on my dear dear friend ! luv Nic